Friday, July 4, 2014

The night before your life changes forever

Dear Jack,

Tomorrow, your life is going to change forever. Tomorrow, Mommy is going to have a baby - your baby sister. Up until this point, you have been the center of our lives, our only child. I know that since you are almost 4, you will still have some of these memories when you are older, and that makes me happy. I know that I remember the times I spent with my Mommy & Daddy before Auntie Kellie was born, so I'm glad you'll have those memories too.

I'm pretty sure that every Mommy worries about what her first baby will think when she brings home the 2nd baby. I worry that you will think that you will think I don't love you anymore. I worry that you will think I'm ignoring you when I'm wrapped up taking care of a fussy baby. I worry that you think you won't have any special one-on-one time with Mommy & Daddy anymore. 

But I also know that by giving you a sibling, we are giving you one of the greatest gifts we ever could. A sibling means that you have a lifelong partner. Someone who is always there for you, whether it be to give you support through a difficult time, to steal your stuff while you are away, or to make you laugh when you want to cry. Siblings are there for sharing toys, or for stealing toys when you're not looking. Either way, siblings make life more colorful, and I'm beyond happy that this is something you will experience. 

I want you to know that even though there is a new baby in the house, that you will ALWAYS be my first baby. No matter how old you are (yes, even when you are 40 and rolling your eyes at me), you will still be my baby. You will still be that baby who giggled like crazy when we would make funny faces and silly noises at you. You will still be that baby who rolled around on the floor to get to toys like a fuzzy little ball.  That little baby who loved Cars and Backyardigans. And even still, that little baby who grew into a tenacious toddler - strong willed and independent.

I want you to know that even though your sister will always be in the picture, there will still be plenty of opportunities for you to have special time with Mommy & Daddy just you and us. I've been told that having multiple children makes your heart expand in ways you never thought possible, and I know that will happen. My heart and my love for you will only grow bigger when your sister is around. You will always be my little Noogle, my silly goose and my buddy. 

I know that you are going to be a fantastic big brother. Even though you race around like a superhero and jump around like a monkey after 4 cups of coffee, I know that you have a gentle heart and a loving soul. I know that you will protect her, show her the ways of the world, and probably sometimes annoy her like crazy. But that is what's fun about having a sibling :)

So even though tomorrow is going to rock your little world, I want you to know that even though many things are going to be different, a lot will still be the same. Such as the fact that I love you more than I ever thought I could love someone, and you will always be the little boy who made me a mommy.

I love you so much my little Nugget...



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Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Sometimes I surprise myself with a good idea

Lately drop-offs at daycare have not been going well. I think its a multifactorial cause: its loud and sensory overload for him, I've been home more and thus he has gotten more time with me, and he knows that something is coming (though I don't think he really gets that it is a baby).

Usually we open the door to his class and he hides behind me with his arm across his face, plastered to my butt and the back of my legs for a good 15 minutes, before I have to peel him off and hand him over to the teachers. The teachers are really good about having the kids give Jack some space when he is walking into the classroom, because if they all come up to him to say hi, he gets super overwhelmed. But there really isn't much they can do about the sheer noise level in the classroom, I mean the kids aren't running around screaming like banshees, but you've got 18 preschoolers all yapping away at once, plus 2 teachers, and it gets kinda loud. And my "kinda loud" is like standing in front of a concert speaker for Jack.

A few weeks ago we were at Toys R Us and I bought Jack a stuffed giraffe. I have a habit whenever I am out and I see one that he doesn't have, I buy it for him. I'm a total sucker. So I had this giraffe waiting for him, waiting for the right moment. Today was the last day I would drop him off at daycare myself without a baby in tow, so I wanted to make sure that it wasn't traumatic for either of us.

Enter the giraffe:

Jack is really into superheros and superhero powers lately, so I used that to my advantage. I handed him the giraffe and told him that this was Barry the Brave Giraffe. I said that I filled him up with brave superhero powers, so that when Jack wasn't feeling brave at school, he could hold Barry up in front of his face and he would protect him.

We've known for a while that SPD kids tend to like to have a "transition item" with them when they are moving from situation to situation and place to place. Jack has always done better with a little toy in his hand when he is going places, but we had stopped doing that in preschool because there was a "no toys from home" rule. Well, I decided to screw that rule, because this giraffe will help him get through his day. (Plus, I labeled it, so its not like its going to get lost in the shuffle)

When I dropped him off today all the kids were on the playground, which definitely made things a little easier, but he still was hiding behind me. I introduced Barry to Jack's teachers and told them about his superpowers. Lo and behold, Jack started walking out from behind me with Barry in front of his face, and was peeking out around to watch his friends play. He did try to cling to me for a few minutes, but then I asked him if Barry needed to be "filled up" with more powers, and he nodded his head. I squeezed Barry 5 times and each time said "Superhero 1, Superhero 2, etc etc" so that he was nice and filled up. I then went inside to drop of his backpack and lunch, came back out not even 2 minutes later and he was in the sandbox with his friends like he had been there all day.  MUCH BETTER.

So if you notice your child is having trouble at drop-off, or transitioning to a new class or activity, or even just having trouble leaving you when you bring him to Grandma's, try finding a stuffed animal or special toy that you can impart "superhero powers" to so that it can help your child "be brave" in situations where they might not feel very comfortable.

And for the record...Jack promptly renamed Barry "Green Lantern" because that was obviously more superhero appropriate ;)


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Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Still here, still pregnant!

Today I'm 37w4d!  Crazy!

For the past week I've really felt like she's coming, but I think she's got her own plan. I think I am on track for my induction date of July 5, and not a day sooner.  July 5 would be cool too, because that's my maternal grandfather's birthday. I know he's tickled about this, and it would be something for her to be proud of someday :)

I honestly don't know how I would have made it working this far if I had decided too. Summer pregnancy is one of the hardest things. No matter how cool we keep the house, I'm still sweating like a beast. I feel like an ice cream cone outside in the sun: any more than 5 minutes and I'm dripping everywhere. Although I love having the weather to be able to wear sundresses and tank tops non-stop.

I discovered yesterday that my linea nigra is out in full force. I don't think I noticed it until post-partum with Jack, and even then it was pretty dark and lasted for a good 6 months. This time, since I'm noticing it now, does that mean its going to look like a Sharpie line for the next 6 months? Who knows.

The baby's room is all ready, diaper bag is packed, hospital bag is mostly packed. My sisters are coming up July 4th and will stay the weekend to help take care of Jack since Mike will be with me at the hospital for most of the weekend. I know he senses something is coming, because he's been extra lovey and clingy. I want to try and keep his life as normal as possible this weekend, so having him stay in his own house and sleep in his bed is important to me.

So for now, I'll just keep my ass on this couch like I have been for the past 3 weeks and hope I can make it to July 5!


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